Word Of The Day
by Violet Lunar Wolf
Summary: One night at the local tavern in Dale Kili has a few too many drinks and starts spilling the secrets of his Khuzdul language to Bilbo...or so he thinks.


**Word Of The Day**

Disclaimer: All Hobbit names, characters and locations belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. I own nothing that you recognize.

It wasn't everyday that the dwarf prince known as Kili drank this much. He might have a drink or two when it was offered to him. After all what dwarf could turn down a good ale or a frosty mug of mead? But tonight was different for this was the fist time since the battle of fie armies had ended that Fili, Kili and Bilbo had had the opportunity to get out and enjoy themselves now that the battle was over and things were finally starting to settle and return to normal in the kingdom of Erebor. And so the young archer had decided to really enjoy himself and indulge in a bit more drink than he normally would.

"Kee, don't you think you've had enough?" said Fili, grinning as he watched Kili reach for his fourth tankard of ale.

The brunette dwarf did not answer. He simply picked up his tankard, buried his nose in it and began to gulp down the cold delicious ale.

Fili chuckled and shook his head. "Alright then, brother. But you are going to have a horrible hangover in the morning."

Beside the two princes sat the hobbit Bilbo. The hobbit watched as Kili guzzled half his drink before setting his tankard down and belching loudly.

Bilbo leaned back a bit in his seat, away from Kili. The smell of alcohol on Kili's breath was overpowering the little hobbit, and Bilbo fanned the air infront of him with a hand as he looked over at Fili and spoke.

"Shouldn't you be doing something to keep him from drinking so much? I mean you are his older brother. Shouldn't you be watching over him?"

"Oh I'm watching him alright," said Fili, lifting his own tankard of ale to his lips and taking a drink. "I'm watching him drink himself into a hilarious stupor."

"But aren't you concerned that he'll make himself sick?"

"No, not at all. Dwarves don't easily get sick from drinking too much. Dwalin usually drinks twice as much as Kili and it never bothers him. Besides Kili is quite funny when he's thoroughly intoxicated. You won't believe some of the things that come out of his mouth when he's drunk."

Kili then turned his head and looked at the little hobbit in the seat next to him.

"Guess what, Bilbo," slurred the inebriated dwarven prince. "It's time for your lesson in Khuzdul. And the word of the day is 'elephant.'"

Bilbo's gaze shifted from Fili to Kili as he glanced at Fili with uncertainty in his eyes.

Was this alright? Was Kili supposed to be telling him the secrets of the dwarven language?

The brunette prime swayed slightly and seized the edge of the bar in his free hand to steady himself, his other hand still holding his half empty tankard of ale.

"The Khuzdul word for elephant," Kili began, "is - " The rest of his sentence spilled out in such a jumbled heap of drunken nonsense that mother Bilbo nor Fili could understand him.

Bilbo blinked, staring at Kili with wide eyes and a look of confusion on his face. "I - I'm sorry. I don't think I caught that."

Kili took another swig of ale and tried again.

"I said gabilkhigirmuzm, master Boggins," he stated plainly. "The mammoth. It literally means 'great nose beast.'"

Fili shorted and shook his head. He knew that what his brother said was wrong but he was enjoying watching Kili make a fool out of himself too much to correct him. Besides Bilbo wouldn't know if Kili was right or wrong anyway.

Kili then leaned back on his bar stool, tipping his head back as he finished his drink, then toppled off his stool and hit the floor in a dead faint.

.oOo.

The next morning Kili awoke with a pounding headache. He slowly opened his eyes and gazed around at his surroundings. He was back in the bedroom he shared with Fili in their palace in Erebor. His brother was there, sitting on the foot of his bed.

Fili smiled at his little brother. "Morning, sunshine! Did you have fun last night?"

Kili groaned, holding his aching head as he sat up slowly in bed. He winced as the light streaming in from the nearby window stung his eyes.

"What happened last night? I feel like a troll sat on my head."

"Oh nothing much," said Fili with a casual shrug of his shoulders. "You just got really drunk and started spilling all the secrets of our ancient dwarvish language to Bilbo."

"I what?!"

"Calm down, Kee. You were drunk. You told Bilbo that the word for elephant is gabilkhigirmuzm, which we both know isn't a real word."

Kili doubled over in bed, holding his head in his hands. He realized that he had made a complete idiot out of himself.

"I'm never drinking that much again, Fili."


End file.
